INFO OVERLOAD!!!

IT'S COLON CANCER AWARENESS MONTH!! GO GET CHECKED!! my family has!!!

I don't even know where to start!! The last 2 weeks have been a whirlwind of emotion and exhaustion! Let's start from the beginning!

March 1st~ We headed up to Victorville at 5:30 am, to be there for my sister and Darren while she had her colonoscopy to check for Colon cancer. Nothing like watching your sister suffer thru a horrible day and night because YOU have cancer that she may have because it is hereditary! My brother has already had his colonoscopy (he really didn't want company for his, but my mom and dad were there for him anyways, I gave him his space he wanted!), and PRAISE THE LORD HE WAS CLEAR!! He did have 2 polyps removed that potentially could have turned into cancer, but they are gone now! Both my sister and brother have to have colonoscopies every 5 years for the rest of their lives. My kids have to start getting them at 23 yrs old and will continue to have to have them every 5 years also. My cousins, aunts, uncle and mom are all at risk too! I can not stress enough to them about getting their colonoscopies done to prevent what happened to me from happening to them!! Back to the story! We got there and went to the outpatient surgery offices where they do the colonoscopy. We sat for what seemed forever for them to call her back!! They finally call her back and she is gone for a LONG time. Finally the nurse came out and called Darren to go back with her, I noticed she was holding a picture of my sister's insides! I FLIPPED!! That is what they had to show me my tumor and that's how I was told it was colon cancer! I looked at my mom and seriously almost lost it!! I thought for sure she had cancer! The next few minutes seemed like hours! Finally I get a text from Darren, "NO CANCER, NO POLYPS, PRAISE GOD!!!" I was so relieved!! Darren came out and said that my mom could go back to see her! I have never seen Darren look so light in all my life, he was so happy and relieved!! He started texting right away and I called to let my dad know! I just want to take this moment to really Praise our Lord!! He kept my brother and sister safe! I just couldn't imagine having to do this with one of them! It would be too much! I already have so much guilt about them having to get colonoscopies every 5 yrs! But, that was a good day for our family!! I was so happy!!

March 2nd~ MY TURN!! I had a CT Scan at 1:30pm. We went in and waited for me to drink my 2 cups of Barium, then, I went back. I did so good!! I didn't even cry (I usually cry out of I guess fear during the CT Scans) Jon went back there with me and right away they set me up to access my port for the contrast. It only took the nurse 3 slow, painful pokes to finally get it in the right place!!!! I almost cried then! So I laid down on the table and we started! They let Jon in to see me in the middle of the scan while they were hooking up the contrast and stuff! They were really nice! 30 minutes in the machine and I was done! They told me that the doctor would have the results by Monday at my appt. So away we went with the entire weekend to stress out about the results. But, the funniest thing happened, I, Christianne Adamik, queen of the worry warts, did NOT spend a second worrying about the results!!

March 5th~Today I had an appt with my oncologist at 8:30am. Jon and I got ready and we were literally walking out the door, when the phone rang. It was his office cancelling my appointment because Dr Panares was out sick that day. So we rescheduled everything for Wednesday, the appt with infusion (Chemo) right after. So about an hour goes by and Jon is heading out to leave for the day and the phone rings again. This time it is Helen, Dr P's head nurse. She asked if we could come in right now and do my blood work and see a new dr named Dr Patel! I didn't understand why we had to go in right then, when we were all set up for Wednesday! But we went in anyways. I go and do my blood work and then wait to be called back to see dr Patel. We get called back to a room and the nurse takes my vitals and as she is inputting them into the computer, she asks if I wanted to know my CT results because they were in already. I deliberated for a second and decided to bite the bullet and get over it. They said during my infusion (which is the next day) that Dr Panares was going to come in and do my appt during chemo to go over my scan also. But I decide to get the information today and then if I come up with questions later on, I can just bring them to him tomorrow. The new doctor I had never met came in the room. She was really nice and upbeat. She gave me the news I have been dreading to hear since this whole ordeal has started 9 months ago, "I am so sorry to have to tell you that it looks like the cancer has spread a little bit!! You have a new one on your liver and a small spot in front of your bladder!" GREAT!!!! Not only do I have more cancer, but now a new organ is being invaded!! Makes me so angry!! So now here is the top question that pops into my mind... Is Dr D (my surgeon) going to put me back together? Dr Patel said there were no good reasons she could think of that he wouldn't do it for me! But remember, he said he would only do the surgery IF I have no new cancer, and I do!!

March 6th~ I go in for chemo........YUCK!!!!! So at this chemo, Susie was here with me. They usually knock me out with Benedryl right away and I sleep for a couple hours. Well, today I know that Dr P was coming in to do my appt with me so they did the Benedryl last before they started the chemo. I stayed awake the entire time waiting for him. Which might not have been the smartest thing to do because he didn't show up until an hour AFTER MY CHEMO WAS DONE!!! So, now when I try to remember what was said, it isn't with the positive twist he had on it.. When he was done talking, I remember feeling light and happy. BUT NOW, looking back at the bullet points of the convo, its not as happy go lucky like I thought it was when he said it. I will write them out as facts. No emotion, just facts and you can go from there.

1. Dr P really wants me to get the surgery to reconnect me. He said he was really going to push Dr D (the surgeon) to do it. His reasons were for quality of life. He thinks with me not having to worry about the colostomy bag all the time, my mind can focus on fighting harder. He also thinks that it would change the mindset I am in now and get me back to how happy and ready to fight I was before the surgery. Not to mention it would make my life normal again, shower when I want, take a bath again, be able to go to the lake on vacation, etc...

2. The next thing he explained to me was there are only 4 chemo treatments for colon cancer. 1 I am allergic to, 2 they tested on my tumor and it did NOTHING to it and then there is the one I am on now. Pretty much this is the only chemo cocktail that can work for me!! So 4-6 weeks after the surgery, I will be starting a drug called Avastin. It is not a chemo, but it should really help.

3. Eventually, in the future, I will need to go to clinical trials. He suggested USC, he said they are state of the art when it comes to colon cancer. He mentioned UCLA and City of Hope, but he said, USC is better than UCLA when it comes to colon cancer and he admitted he really doesn't know a lot about COH! But he did say for me to check out their websites and see what I thought. I know a lot of my friends and family want me to go to COH, so I will be researching that one for sure.

So first battle we need to take on is Dr P getting Dr D to do the surgery!!

March 12th~ This afternoon I received a call from Dr P's office saying he wants to schedule a PET Scan for me for this week. I asked why did I need another scan when I JUST had a CT Scan!! Then I asked what the difference between a PET Scan and a CT Scan was. She didn't know any of the answers to these simple questions. So she said she would have Dr P call me and he could make the appt. So when I didn't hear from him at 4pm. I decided (With Nanny's suggestion fresh in my mind) to just call them and set up the appt anyways, because what if it was for Dr D? So, I called them and she set up the appt for March 15th @ 7:30am. After a few questions from her, I said, "You mentioned I can't be around pregnant woman for 4 hours after the scan! What about my 2 year old daughter?" Again, she doesn't know, so she puts me on hold and about 5 mins later the phone starts ringing and Dr P was on the other line. He says that I can be around my daughter, it is just a precaution that I can't be around pregnant people. Well, just to be safe, we are starting Caylee in a preschool for 2 half days. She needs more stimulation and my mom and I need a little of a break! I am so sad that she is starting preschool so early, but as a pre k teacher, I know she will LOVE it!! So she will be at school until 12:30pm, then my mom can pick her up and put her straight in her room to take her nap for another 2 hours and then we will be all clear of the radiation! Then he said that Dr D was completely on board to get my surgery done. He just wants a Pet scan to make sure there is no cancer, disease and to make sure my intestines are healthy enough to be put back together. If there is cancer, disease or they are not healthy, the surgery wont work! But Dr P said he looked over my scans from Friday 4 times and there is NOTHING in the area he will be doing surgery on!

We have also started family counseling! The counselor said we are just under more stress than most anyone he knows and that we are a head of the game by having the kids under a strict daily schedule. The boys are both exhibiting signs of real stress, insomnia, dropping grades, fear of getting cancer themselves, stomach aches every time they eat, etc...

So, please pray for my kids and the counselor to teach them and all of us, to handle stress appropriately so we are an emotionally healthy family. Also, pray that Caylee just loves Preschool and that we made the right decision by putting her in at only 2 years old! Pray that my PET Scan comes back clear and we can schedule this surgery soon!! Remember to keep praying because HE is listening!! Lots of love to you all!! Christianne